Archive for the ‘Love’ Category

The Anemone Postulate

As I stared into the deep blue aquarium, I got lost.  So, hold on a second,  as I reminisce…

My child-like nature kicked in. And I followed the fish around. Not noticing anyone around me, I…

“Sir! Please, stop touching the glass?!”

Who’s the cute little fishy, fish.  Who’s the cute little clown fish.  Yes, you are.  Yes you are…

“Sir! If I have to ask you again…”

I’m finding the walk to be pleasant.  I haven’t put that much effort to get to the other side of the building in a long time.  This walk, I was hoping would be, the last time.  For a long time.

I couldn’t do it again.

The nights were long, tiring, and heartbreaking.   Hearing all the beeps.  It started out as a musical presence, but overtime it turned into a constant reminder of the situation, causing lots of tossing and turning of sleeplessness.

And somewhere during all that time, I had a conversation with Abraham Lincoln, a beaver who couldn’t stop cheating if his life depended on it, and some guy in a space suit.  But, that’s another story.

It's only painful if you... Ouch! Now you tell me!

It's only painful if you...

And just like the military someone came and woke you up at 5am.  To go stand out in the hallway until they were done.  Half tired, hair, I’m sure,  looking like Jack Nicholson on his worse days.  Then, they leave and I would then go lay back down, and doze off for an hour or so.

Waking up to a jolt. Looking at the time, grabbing everything, and in a brief moment kiss my adorable daughter.  Looking at her for a second, and thinking how wonderful she is, I then moved quickly.  Then out of nowhere, there was that aquarium again, so I had to…

“Sir, again, if you don’t stop tapping that glass…!”

Oops, got to go, she appears to be picking up a phone, and pointing at me.

Out into a much more brisk late September morning.   But, before all this happened, and at the last minute before I left, she yells out,

“Dad!”

She puts her hand to her mouth and blew me a kiss, and told me she loved me. I capture it, put it to my cheek, and blew one back.

And, I’m back on that walk.  Down long corridors. People moving briskly as they come in for work.  But I don’t notice them.  I walk out the doors, and feel the cold rush of air on my face.

Peew! That’s some quality air.

Odd, it doesn’t feel as cold as I thought it would, and is that a sun I see?

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How Could This Possibly Go Wrong?

You just received the best possible gift in the world today.  And, now that the day has ended, you feel yourself falling to sleep wondering and hoping that you get it again tomorrow.

Just this morning you were running circles around the family, getting everything ready after waking up bright and early.  Preparing for each person who has an important place in your home.

But, oddly enough, this is not what you did today.  And, today went on to remind you, that you were in love.

There is nothing special about today.  It’s not a holiday.  It’s not a birthday, and nothing has happened that would make you think that this moment, was anything that would feel like an apology.

The funny thing is that it wasn’t just a moment.  A moment can be fleeting, disregarded and forgotten.  But what you saw and were given, was something

Well, maybe this could go wrong.

Well, maybe this could go wrong.

that happened throughout the day.  You couldn’t believe that it was many moments.

You  noticed it when you woke up, with that gentle kiss.

But it didn’t end.

It continued with a note showing up on the mirror, telling you that you were looking at the most beautiful women in the world.  And the fact that the kids were fed and there he was starting on the lunches.  You join him, not to take it over but to do it with him,  as you didn’t want to miss out on this moment to do it together.

Then you get this funny text message on your cell.  It was short, sweet and too the point.

“Hi sweetie, just wanted to let you know that I was thinking of you.  Meeting sucks, but it will be all better when I see you at lunch”

He is anxious, work is getting in the way, but he works through all of it to quickly leave and meet you for lunch.  An experience felt with small moments of smiles, chuckles, wonderful conversation, sweet whisperings and that gentle touch of the hand.

But it didn’t end there, later you see this:

“Hey sweetie, work is running late,  won’t be home till 7pm.  Start dinner without me, and I will see you then.”

You prepare for a long evening, when it feels like the kids are exploding at 5pm right on the dot, and you see that you have another 2 hours.

This doesn’t look good.

Tension starts to rise. Complaints run rampant, and you within 5 minutes become tired and exhausted, and your smile is waning.

And at that last bearable moment, which was only 10 minutes, he comes walking through the door.  He took some time in the afternoon, canceled the meeting and made it home in time to rescue the situation.

But it still didn’t end.

The two of you, together, prepared dinner and got the table ready. And in one of those fleeting moments, waiting for the kids to arrive, you slow danced to a nameless song. One only the two of you knew.

This evening didn’t end.  The comfort and togetherness, and the joint effort to make each other happy, was in full force.

Of all the things that happened, it could easily have been those last two hours that would of changed the day from an excellent day, to becoming exhausted and feeling like you were on your own.  Are we willing to give up other moments that may appear important, for the more important moments?  To take a moment that would enhance and build a bond so strong, that it would never break?

When you can, tell her she is important, by changing what you can for her.  Keep your spouse the center of the universe and have work, friends and social events become second, and make her second-to-none.

Marriage is about giving of those moments that create the firm and loving bonds, that gives you the sense of love and pride, and the pure honor of loving the one person, who will love you so deeply, that you can never see the end.

And, by doing this, you have created it so the end won’t exist.

That 5k run is looking way easier

You just finished running that 5k marathon. You conquered a feat that you told everyone that you wanted to do. You stumbled a few times, but you got up and became stronger and more agile.

Yeah, I know I can’t do a 5k in my dreams, mind you.  And thinking about one right now cause’s hives.  But hear me out.

Awww!

Awww! Aren't you just adorable.

So you just finished this 5k run. You spent day-after-day of practicing and preparing to run like you were running in Ancient Rome.  Not minus the clothes, because we all know that running in Ancient Rome, was a sure fire way to remind yourself that you have one too many pounds sitting in all the wrong places.

But you practiced.  Each day, you got up and stressed those important muscles.  Ran in circles for about an hour and then worked 8 hours a day. All before 8AM! Impressive!  Okay, the last part isn’t true, but you felt like it.

And then something happened… You had this new feeling… It hurt… And it hurt A LOT!
[ This is where we sympathize with your plight ]

You tried again the next day, and this time, it still HURT A LOT – Really I’m not forcing you to do this, you can stop anytime. I’m not the devil, I can’t convince you to do anything.

But! Something does happen after you notice that it hurts less.

After all the pain, the tears, and after the whining subsided and your muscles all of sudden started responding to your every whim, You, yes you! Felt like you were on top of the world.  Your happier, people are patting you on the back, your winning awards, and friends have popped up out of the woodwork.

It could be true!

And each day after that, you felt better, hurt less, and started to save homeless kitties – and that adorable puppy you named Chuck.

The best and most exciting thing about this, besides your new-found friends, is that you are happier.

You have conquered the 5k.  You know how it feels to win.  You knew what it took to get there.  And, you practiced.

Have you ever wondered how some couples make their marriage look easy? Saying to yourself,

“Self, I wish I could make my relationship work as well as theirs! What’s wrong with me? Why am I not as lucky?”

Well nothing is wrong with you,  and I will pretend that you weren’t harsh with yourself, cause, nobody likes haters.

But, just like that 5k run that you just conquered,  you needed to practice.   Your too hard on yourself and need to do what you did to win the 5k.  Wake up every morning committing to stretch those muscles, that you call your marriage.  Or, at least start drinking more water.

Cause, You know it’s good for you.

And, remember, it wasn’t until you won that marathon that you started helping the puppies, and that adorable little kitty named Mr.  Peppers, III.

And really?! How can you say no to helping kitties?  Won’t you think of the kitties?

Ewww! Yuck! Get it Off! Get it Off!

… What is this I’m feeling?

Is it guilt… No, that would feel like I got kicked.

Is it…

I just don’t know? It’s almost like… NO!!!!!!!   [ What is this panic I feel? ]

Coodies! Doesn't he know? Doesn't he care?

Coodies! Doesn't he know? Doesn't he care?

Now I’m panicky.  And it’s weird.  Now I’m getting this tingly sensation.. I wonder if it’s a heart attack?  Left arm isn’t tingly.  Hmm… Can’t be that.

What is it? What is it?

Now I can’t breath, is this right? Hold on a sec, I’m going to check my pulse.

Okay, very weird, it’s fast and then slows down when I feel comfort.  But fast when it’s all anxiety.

I think I remember this feeling.

Where did I feel this?